Intelligence Insulted

3 posts in one day. Shocker.

Now we all know the world of big business needs to make profits. Granted. So what do they do, to achieve this?
1) Reduce costs
2) Rebrand existing products as new
3) Create new products
4) Innovate on existing products

In some areas it is pretty difficult to reduce costs, because they are already nearly as low as they can go. Therefore companies go for strategy 2. Washing powder would be a case in point. Thus we have these amazing ads that suddenly proclaim "NEW Ariel washes 11% cleaner" or "Persil gets the same results at 30 degrees". It really is difficult to believe these messages. My clothes were perfectly clean 10 years ago, so how come Daz has improved 6 times in that period?? How can you squeeze more cleaning power out of a minuscule white granule??

As for points 3 & 4 - I'm out of blades for my Gillette super dooper Mach 3 razor, but the supermarket was out of them too so I was considering the even more superfandabidoozy Fusion razor (now with 5, Five, Cinque, Funf blades). I was already more than happy with my 3 bladed razor, but this is a penis envy thing only guys will understand ("My razor has more blades than yours AND it vibrates!"). In a moment of clarity I just took a look at the price of the blades - 14.99 EUR for 4 blades. Quick check on price of [non-existent] Mach 3 blades - 7.99 EUR.

Now, I'm not a rocket scientist, non even a nuclear physicist, but pay twice the price for the same product? Will it shave twice as quick? Or will it be twice as pleasurable?? I will I be so smooth that women will just slide off my face???

Gillette, you suck giant anteater cahones.

The Onion thinks so too. So there.